Healing without Judgement
Are there “toxic” people in your life? Do you long to end friendships or connections with people who you consider negative or “needy”?
I have recently been asked to create workshops or teaching programmes around these topics. That’s what “people want and need I am told.
I have 27 years experience of teaching interpersonal skills including:- assertiveness, conflict management, constructive feedback, dealing with aggression, self esteem confidence building, dealing with bullying and harassment etc.
However it is exactly because of my teaching and coaching experience that I recognise that we cannot banish “toxic people” from our life. It is not enough to transform our mental and emotional energy.
We would miss the divine opportunity for self healing and spiritual growth.
I am not saying that you must stay in relationships which are physically or emotionally damaging – this would be counter-productive as well as mentally and emotionally damaging.
However life events are specifically designed to create mental emotional and spiritual evolution and learning. This in turn generates higher levels of compassion wisdom and power within us which can be used for the highest good of ourselves and the planet.
We must discover how to heal and transform our inner self and use discernment as a tool for deciding which relationships honour our highest evolution. Those that do no……should be released with love and gratitude.
Learning is a gift….. even in its most challenging expressions. It is important to recognise the principles which underpin the structure of our reality. They are often referred to as the Spiritual Laws and the Hermetic Principles.
A basic principle “like begets like” means that what you judge you become. So if you see someone as toxic you create toxic energy. It’s as simple as that!
It’s a human trait to focus on the effects of other people’s behaviour on our emotional wellbeing. This is natural. if you have been on the receiving end of unacceptable conduct at the hand of someone you will recognise the powerful impact on your mental and emotional health.
I have seen first-hand the short and long term effect of this! I know that for many the debilitating effects are permanent.
This was one of the key reasons for my spiritual quest to find meaning and understanding in life and its purpose.
Society and culture teaches us to define people by the way they interact with us or through the cultural habits and norms they adopt.
So things become defined by polarity:-
• good or bad
• right or wrong
• evil or kind
• toxic or pure
However the Hermetic Principles and the Spiritual Laws are immutable and impartial which means that there is no value placed on either of the poles.
Rather it is the aspect within us called duality which is triggered by our emotions which dictates our values.
Values relate to our ego and personality self – so there can be powerful judgement within our perception/s. We may not even be conscious of our hidden biases, particularly if they are “learned” from those around us.
Going back to like begets like to condemn someone as toxic you create toxic energy. However it’s your toxic energy (not the other person’s) as you created it. Once you create something you cannot ignore it. Again that is the Law of Responsibility – what we create we must transform.
The other person may have created toxic energy but it will be up to them to heal and transform their energy. It is not up to us to judge them or their motives.
We see the effect of climate change on the planet and in particular the effect of plastic use on the environment.
What we cannot see is the effect of our judgemental mental and emotional responses on the collective consciousness. It slows down the evolution of humanity as well as contributing to the level of fear anxiety anger and conflict within others.
As I mentioned before no one would want or expect you to stay in an unhealthy environment – this is not the purpose of your soul’s expression.
The purpose of each experience is to learn heal and transform our physical emotional and mental bodies and bring our energy into a higher resonance. To achieve this we must resist the ego temptation to “label” the behaviour, attitudes or values of others. Otherwise nothing changes.
A different and more empowering way to transform and heal is to use the following template when you experience conflict:-
• sit quietly where you will not be disturbed
• take a few moments to quietly observe your breathing
• sense that you are stepping into your heart centre – you can visualise you heart as a beautiful colour using your own intuition
• stay here for a few moments
• notice in your body where you are feeling the anxiety, tension, anger, fear etc.
• sense your heart connecting to the energy ….. you can gently hum as you do this…..
• sense around you a golden or platinum ball of light protecting you from all external influences………
• when you are ready say the following either silently or out loud
• I love honour and accept all my feelings – do this 3 times
• I am perfect as I am (x 3)
• I AM THAT I AM (x 3)
• stay in this space for a few moments to allow the energy to integrate
• now sense that your emotions are moving into neutral …… no judgement….. just acceptance….. of all that the experience has taught you….. neither good nor bad…. right nor wrong…..
• sensing that you are moving from judgement into discernment……
• what feels right for you to do now? stay in your heart centre and listen to your own inner wisdom and intuition …. (staying in neutral)
• If it is right to do so from your heart release all connection to the other person with gratitude for the experience and blessing for the lesson they have given you
• take a few moments to sit quietly and hum…… then open your eyes
Release connections to the other person without judgement or labelling of their behaviour or actions. Release with detachment and discernment as they no longer are in resonance with your energy vibration.
This creates a very different outcome. Once we start working this way we will clear the toxic levels on the surface of our beloved planet. People will feel the difference.
It’s simple, its profound and it’s so needed.
Lets walk together in love light and divine harmony.
If you want to find out more about this subject or any of the other teachings and one to one sessions please feel free to email me firstname.lastname@example.org or use my face book page to pm me.